subzaphira

So about me, always a big question for anyone, perhaps the best place to start is how I see the world through my connections to others, something of my philosophy I like to think I build my life on. You are important, people are important each and every one of us , and if we choose to build a relationship between us we commit to being central to each other's happiness. I would say I have a tender heart, but I am strong about establishing and keeping personal boundaries. I am told and I believe I am empathetic and compassionate, but I also believe that it's best if people solve their own problems and learn to take care of themselves, if they are able. I am deeply moved by the needs of others, but I know that if you don't take good care of yourself, you'll wind up being of no use to anyone. So I am thoughtful in my compassion. I strive to be fair and sensible, taking care of others but not neglecting my own needs in the process. When someone really is in trouble and wants support and or assistance, I like to collaborate with them toward a solution; they do their part, and I do mine. If you consider carefully, and respond in a sensible way; together we can move through the difficulty. I seldom act impulsively; rather, when anything arises, I take my time to think through the situation. This contemplative quality usually means that I arrive at a solution, that's fair for the other person and also fair for me.
Like someone who can sleep comfortably on either side of the bed, I am equally at home with ideas and beliefs that I have held for a long time and with new ways of thinking and believing that grow out of intellectual curiosity.

My sense of who I am and what my place is in the world around you rests on values and principles that are the solid ground I walk upon. I have tested them, they work for me, and much of the time I am content to trust them, that is, until some provocative new idea slips in from a conversation, book or some flight of active imagination. "Hmmmm. What's this. Never thought of it before." And off I go, exploring.

Since I love to learn, I have always been teachable; I absorb new information, which means that I am well-educated in things that matter to me. Sometimes my intellectual exploring will lead me back to where I started; the "next new thing" proves too shallow or impractical. But once in a while a new idea or belief will dislodge me from the ground I stand upon; it is so compelling and persuasive that I will step away from the tried-and-true and embrace this notion that is brand new . Because I hold both solid beliefs and I am still open to new ideas, I am accepting of other people and other ways of thinking and believing. I am flexible enough to listen to something new and different, or something outside of my comfort zone; if it works for me, I will take it in, and if not, I will let it go. In this sense, I know who I am: I am neither closed-minded nor wildly open-minded, but walk somewhere near the middle of the road.
Historically, I have lead a full life, I have been married, I was a tradesperson, Owned some small businesses, travelled around Australia some, divorced, re-educated myself. Now to ensure honesty and full disclosure I spent a number of years leading a pretty shady life, trouble with the law, substance abuse issues, addiction, jail time, all of this well and truly behind me now probably by 13yrs. The good stuff I have re-educated myself with diplomas in business and also mental health alcohol and other drugs and am currently studying for my Bachelor of Social Work. I would call this turning the negative to the positive. It is important you hear all this because it tells you something about my complexity and my strength.

Physically, with all those changes and challenges' in life I am disease free, but I have wacked on some weight(something I am currently changing).

Think about what I have told you here and if you choose, get back to me.